Have you ever slept over at a friend's house and had to get up to go pee in the dark? I'm gonna go ahead an assume that at some point you probably ran into something or stubbed your toe. It probably hurt and took you a moment to get your bearings. This is what it's like to live with anxiety. Everything that you run into in life is a surprise and it always takes a toll on your body and it always takes you time to recover. When you live with anxiety for a while, you begin to get angry with yourself for running into these road blocks. You start to feel dumb and you get mad because you are always falling into the lie that you're not good enough or smart enough to get past these issues that keep taking you by surprise. People with anxiety don't plan when they're gonna run into these things that make life hard, in fact, they do just about everything to avoid it. I don't know about other people, but I get embarrassed if I have an episode in front of people, which makes it so much bigger. It feels like the blanket I tripped on in the floor of this dark house turned into a curio cabinet that I ran into full force. Sometimes when things get super hectic, I feel like Alice falling down the rabbit hole. People, God love them because they're only trying to help, don't help at all. I've learned that having friends can make walking in the dark harder because instead of using night vision goggles or a flashlight to help you see, they will lead you straight into a barrier. Get me straight, I'm not saying that you should just follow a friend, but I am saying that sometimes you just have to. I'm also not saying that they are all bad, but it;s hard to find a good friend who can understand your issues and stick by you through them.
I'd also like everyone who doesn't have anxiety to understand that quoting scripture at someone does not make it suddenly go away. Telling someone to cast their cares upon Jesus doesn't really work unless you can walk them through how to do that.
What does it really mean to 'cast your cares'? How does one do that? How do I physically cast away all this anxiety? I don't understand how to do that.
These are questions that real people with real anxiety have. And honestly, when someone says, "oh sweetie, as a Christian that has no place in your life. Just cast your cares upon Jesus," it's really frustrating because as Christians, we already know. We struggle with the fact that we know we shouldn't have this thing eating away at our thoughts and consciousness, but yet it is still there. We feel guilty because we want to cast all our cares upon Him, but the thing is, we don't know how. Anxiety has held onto us and been so constant that we don't know how to just give it away. How do you give a feeling away, especially to someone you can't physically see. It sounds crazy.
Well, the thing is, it is crazy. Everything about Christianity is crazy. The love of Jesus is crazy. And that love is what will set you free.
Here's how to give it to Jesus:
1. Prayer... I know.. so cliche, but I swear it works!
Start out with just a few moments each day. Just talk to Him. It doesn't have to be about your anxiety, but just take a few minutes and thank Him for what you have or pray for others that are going through things. Honestly, if you feel the need to just yell at God and let him know that you're mad or frustrated, go ahead and do so. He already knows how you feel and He is the only person who won't get mad at you for expressing your feelings in a yelling manner (trust me.. I've been there and I still do it). Prayer doesn't have to be eloquent and beautiful. It's literally just communicating with your heavenly Dad. <3
2. The Word... Yes... also cliche.
You could start out with a few verses a day. Google what the Bible says about anxiety or self-worth. I would suggest searching for devotional reading plans on the YouVersion Bible app in both the App Store and Google Play (no this company did not pay me to advertise for them.. I just really like their plans and the app).
3. Talk with a trusted friend or adult.
Find yourself a spiritual leader, friend, adult, random person on the street and tell them your struggle. Sometimes just talking about what we are going through just makes the journey a little easier. It always helps when you know that you have someone on your side.
Just remember that you're not gonna pray one time and you'll never feel anxious again. This is a process of becoming deeply rooted in the love of Jesus. Anxiety is a lie of the devil and no matter how dark it seems to be right now, joy comes in the morning. We fight things that are not of this world, but the weapons of our warfare they are not carnal, but are mighty through our Lord.
